(Blackboard: written is 'pivot')
Being human, I pivot on the knowledge
I know very little, indeed
Cross out that word
Now, read it
Could I make a suggestion?
Why don't you pospone the suggestion
There was obviously something wrong
in the way that I read the word 'pivot'
That's more like it
Shut up, please
Do you mean-- go back in time?
(Pause. Professor erases)
Now, write it again
Now, add to it
(He x's it out, then he erases that)
Wouldn't somebody like a drink?
(she makes them)
Notice, I didin't have to ask myself,
I just included myself
These can't be real questions.
These are just thought up by somebody.
Well-- no. There wasn't much THINKING
Yes and no
Why so indescive?
I'm more comfortrable in that position,
yes-- but I think also, it enables me to be more accurate
Hold on tight
Well-- what do you around here to hold
onto. Me for instance?
Well, suppose I came over to you and held on.
There's still a wide spectrum of choice
How many times have I told you, Melinda
is a very sensua; creature, who encourages aberant behavior, thew
more aberant, the more rewarding
Wrell, I'd rather fulfil my own fantasies,
rather than somebody elses
Why? --Oh, I know why
Well, the minute I have a fantesy, it's no longer mine, is it
It immediately floats out there in that
never-never land between the three of us
Oh, more than three are involved, rest
Is there a reason to escape?
You can hardly do otherwise. It happens automatically
I think it's already been erased--
It was still visible
But we knew it was effectively erased, so even if we glanced at the blackboard casually, we didn't see something calling for attention, we saw something erased.
As if it didn't exist, in other words
In spite of that, I feel like I accomplished
Well, in another realm perhaps.
I just heard a voice. It said 'the numbers
That seems self evident
Self evident to hear a voice, inside
What did it say
The numbers are numerous
Well-- numbers by definition
--that could be the surface intrepretationWhat I want
is to be a place
from which truth
--and now we have a problem--
I want to be a place
through which truth passes?
Well, everyone is.
But when it passes through me--
to strip its protective cloak
to reveal it
as it tries to pass in secret.
why does it try to pass in secret?
Revealed. It takes the momentary shape
of something it is not?
If actors speak this,
then it no longer happens.
I want to be a place trhough which truth passes. Did I get that right?
(Goes text and reads)
I want to be a place through which passes
Turn the page
I think I'd like to linger over this
page a bit longer
Turn the page
What does it say.
No. That's my line. What does it say
(Page ripped off and eaten)
Now-- do you consider yourself a place through which truth passes? Or more accurately-- do I consider you a place through which truth passes. Well-- you won't know the answer to that because you can't get inside my head.
You can make guesses
What's a guess. Now-- this is very interesting. What's a guess.
Jesus christ-- this is the most interesting thought I've had in a long time. What's a guess.
Jesus christ. This is the most interesting
meal I've had in a long time. What's a guess.I want to be a being,
out of which truth courses, like lightening striking a drum
This food must be transformed.
Into reading. Or read-ability.
The reading must be transformed into
I want to crack open and pour out truth, but I pour out nothing.I want truth to pour forth.
Does it have to be from my mouth? I wonder.
It's for this reason, inter-action between us, stops
Can truth come from two people? I think
Truth about what
If it's about something, it's not truth
I'll explain, but don't confuse my explination
with the truth
If it's about nothing-- what it's about
eats it, and the truth, eaten, just turns into part of what eats
it-- ie. the thing it's about
I don't know if that's true
It's not true, it's an explination,
even if it's a fairly accurate explinationTruth pours. Truth cracks
open the landscape by not speaking its own name. Truth is silent,
for if it speaks, it baffles the receipient, fuzzing the ear,
fuzzing the eye, fuzzing the mind. So kind, cruel truth is silent,
and works in secret, where real proliferation can take place.The
most important thing
I'll say this.
The most important thing can't be said because the speaking of it, makes it never again available.
He who, after experience has faded, returns; to the realm in which the feet were placed.
The agitation as the remark that launched a thousand faces into their extremem grimaces of grief and transformed grief--
building a world of intricate human relationships
that only a detective magician could
The empty space of his hunger.
That's what he uncovered.
But so unveiled, who could come into
real being. Who could cry more than the one who did cry-- tears
of a particular drift, that sailed feeling into a space where
feeling, stumbling like a child, reversed all the rules.
(You have the feeling it means something, but you don't know what. That; giant fascination,
that; lift of agression that eats by
planting an idea in the very correct field)
You can't handle me, is the meaning I'm trying to get across. But when the right energy rises-- all sinks into the same right/wrong reason, and song is singing to itself, singable as full song.
Suppose. . . everybody vanished.
OK. Now: what do I have to deal with.
I have to deal with myself in relation to something very different.
I have to deal with myself in relation
to. . .leave that blank, thank you.If I went crazy, my problem
could be solved
My best ideas are those that turn against
themselves when clarified
Enough energy was released, to make
of a major committment to the truth, the truth.
This clocked out
Vortive aspects of my dilema. You have
to be into aberant things in order to be into straight things.
Wanna bet I can pull it off?
I sum your vortex
What you split with me, faxes falseWhat
rolled into his life was. . . not rollable
Isn't anything, potentially--
Yes. With resistance. If I tried to
roll this table, for instance.
Is it possible that you--
Anything is possible
I don't care to DROWN in this arena.
Ah-- water can be transported. It can
become a dominant feature
Shall I freshen--?
Are you certain this relationship works?Are you waiting for the phone to ring?
Ring it does not. Nevertheless, your
attention remains. Focused. Glued, almost
Why was I waiting for it to ring?
It's a good exercise
I suppose something inside me is being
strengthened by that exercise
You tell me
And I don't. And that's the very muscle
Notice how I can make my eyes converge on any particular object in my field of vision?
Here's what would be more useful.
To make them converge on an object not
in my field of vision
No. Not further. Not behind my head, or to the side-- just not in my field of vision
Let's say-- about three feet in front
of me, at waist height.
Anything interesting in that paper?
I try not to read it
Right. News is a distraction. I agree
Was that the ohone?
I thought I heard it ringing
Well, if it did it was too soft for me to hear
Maybe focusing on that object that's
outside your field of vision, well, maybe it caused an auditoru
I wouldn't, then, call it a hallucination.
I'd rather say-- has it ever happened some time in the past
That it rang?
Don't answer. That's my advice
Oh, that's a tough one.
(Stops ringing)Suppose-- just suppose--
Suppositions aren't your cup of tea
As deep as it gets, and no deeper
That's my level of vibrating also
A trade. Happiness for energyIf it's
true that your bell is broken--
Would I lie?
If it's true. How do you know when to
Notice. Few come
How did I get here?
Now THAT, IS problematic.
How did you get here
Let's say, I insinuated myself
That's a technique I'm not familar with
Does it bear any relation to doing imitations?
Any relation. Let me think about that
"Nice day" -- who am I imitating?
Maybe you're just truing to insinuate
yourself into my good graces
So my question is answered?
I think it was MY question
Ah, now I remember it. You asked if
it was a nice day
Typical kind of question
You'd like to come up with a non-typical
kind of answer
I'd like to be released
From this. . .particular form of social
Nothing could be easier
Run that by me a little more--
A little more what?
(Song-- X never frightened me?)Have
you checked your shoe laces?
Tied or untied
When I check-- or when I tied them,
upon putting on my shoes-- tied.
I have every reason to believe so
That means, if you walk, your shoes
will not be falling off
I should think so
I should think so too
Pure poetry in that
Travelling around. Shoes well secured
to the feet
But don't you think checking them would
be in order
Excuse me for a minute (looks). Everything
is quite all right
I have the feeling, these shoes are
such, even if the laces came undone-- the shoes would probably
remain in place. On the foot. They might flop about a bit, but
they wouldn't fall off.
Then you're in good shape
Yes, I am
Shoe wise.I walked by this door several
times, without having the courage to enter
Enough said? I should think so.
If I could manage to lift from this position, and I could-- what might be revealed to me.
What came true? Ah, nothing came true
You and I don't have any trouble maintaining
a peverse relationship
Tell me another story-- make it more
OK. Here's the situation. I forget everything,
everything I ever said, everything I ever experienced-- and now
I'm into magic.
I see very little evidence
I'm about to give you a demonstration
Hey-- this is the demonstration
Excuse me if I don't get it.
(Opens book, reads) Butte Montanna,
I thought you said no more getting it
You don't understand-- this isn't a
book. This is a telephone book
(phone rings, music out)
Is that magic or is that mot magic
Pick it up
Are you kidding? And spoil the magic?
(Goes back to book, reads off more
I'd be worried, if I were you, about
what's happening to your karma
This is white magic
Led me tell you-- the difference between white magic and black magic is just this MUCH
(Holds her fingers apart)
I want to remember you like that
It was a very powerful position
You just don't want to be reminded of your karma
I made a decision. I don't answerWhat
could be the reason for revenge on such a scale.
Equal to the thing itself
Equal to rain
Equal to the postman
Equal to cerial
Equal to radio waves
Equal to smiles
Equal to forgetting things
Equal to the thing itself
Know my power and become invulnurable
Know my power and manifest what is not presentI choose the lamp
I choose the floor
I choose the chair
I choose the book which rests in the chair
I choose the space behind my body
I choose the small helicopter
I choose the flowers
I choose the uprightness of the wall to my left
I choose the oxygen
I choose the machine that enters and whirlsWas there someone in the room who was not here before
Was there someone who spoke my name by waving his hands
Was there someone without an expression on his face who smiled
Was there someone who lied by lying
Was there a king
Was there an animal
Was tghere a pastry chief with no taste who turned out pastry
Was there somebody who looked like me in a costumeGive me air
Give me something to eat
Give me gloves
Give me an idea
Give me silence
Give me a drum
Give me a key
Give me a nameYou think this is a pen.
But it can also be used as a hypodermic needle. It can inject
fluid into the vein.
No-- in fact
It's not very well designed for that
It isn't designed at all
It can function the way I've described. Watch
Now. The story-- or poem-- or whatever the hell it was--is really inside me
What else can I do with this pen.
I found a real hypodermic needle. I could probably use this thing to write a poem.
(Fills it, writes)
Let's see what I could use this pen
for. I could, if I still possessed an old fashioned radio, use
it to replace one of the radio tubes-- but of course, nowadays
radios have transistor circuts.
Just use the pen itself as a radio. That's how I was going to use this hypodermic needle
(Pause, holds up)
It's bound to receive something, music,
messages, static that's coded
I'm going to use this table leg for
I don't want any details
I'm going to do it later. You don't have to watch.
Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll use it as an airline icket
(Rips off leg)
Unfortunately, it won't fit in my picket
where I usually keep airline ticketsI see no point to the extended
statement. What I have to say if brief-- like a flash of lightening.
The word spoken: like a crack of light.
You see? Everything got touched by that
A color rubbed off on everybody's fingers
Are you running away from me?
I have a certain weight, being here
I need to re-be you
I need to re-be you
These people facing us would be happier if we served refreshmentsOn a sunday afternoon, subjected to a certain quality of light. . . oceans of aprons. . . .quarrels of quarks. . . the game board had better be revealed.
(Uncovered, swept to floor)
Time to play, by dis-play.
Touching was so aberent to us
Killed by kisses.
If certain words sound like certain
other words-- who's the best to guess.
My meaning can only deepen. That's its
finding itself level, at last
Oh snake, troubled as you are. Can
Let me part.
Hips hold when the major rain--
Nothing in the connection--
Double daughters who doubt me--
The slight, slipped through.
What is this
What is this
I don't know to what you refer
This is an idea that is not allowed
to come into existence. Its power is not, thereby, minimized.
It still exerts power.
What idea is that
This is an idea that doesn't exist
I make the leg of this table vibrate.
And failing to do so-- something writes on my forehead in letters
of fire-- affirmation
Affirmation of the important clock.
To grapple with this, is to grapple
with the truthWhat in me, vanished
Having just arrived. Knowing not 'rules',
'laws'. The ettiqute of the situation--
How can you say-- having just arrived
Is it not true that, here, day after
day, you come for a meal?
I'm never satisfied
The law here-- is one method of organizing the day
(Pause, other confused)
There's no connection. There's no connection
here to the outside world.
Count your blessings
There is no outside world. There is
an opportunity to build from scratch
I'd like some fruit
I think the outside world is trying
to break through
Well, I just won't let that happen!
(Servant) Some of us don't have an easy
go of things
Eat fruit that's left over when I finish
Will that be enoigh for a whole lifetime?
Wait a minute! It's very hard for me,
or anybody-- to think in terms of a whole lifetime
Some people manage
Anyway-- if I do that-- what comes up
is death, death at the end. Then in retrospect, earlier events
I take it back
(different cards up)
Could it be a card trick
It could be a way to jump from one logical
catagory to another
An object might serve the same purpose.
(Lamp set down)
Could everything go with everything
else, literally. Is this possible.
Could I ask for this pineapple. This
pineapple. Adorable; but if I were the receipient. Let me ask,
without having to commit myself. . .to real asking
Isn't it adorable?
If I don't have to ask. . .then, it's
adorable.I'm lost in language
If you're lost-- where are we?
That's easy. You're here sitting in
front of me. Aren't you aware of the fact I lied?
Don't be so hard on yourself
Chop off this hand that offended
Isn't it the tongue?Tell me sir. Can
you see the sun, dripping like gold honey, down the face of the
building across the way?
I wouldn't describe it like golden honey,
but like a blast from an oven.
It doesn't matter how one describes
it. Let's put on our regalia.
"The begining of the cerimony is upon us"Tell me, tell me
why do you wear that
Only because I'm in love with sleep
Tell me why are the eyes visible
Because the world exists to be eatenHere,
try on these hats
None of them fit
Are you sure, or are you arbitrary
I can only juggle with the paraphenalia
Don't expect me to hamper you
I don't. I still move in any and all
It must be insight
Your tremendous insight.
I got lost
It wasn't my doing
You lost me
It wasn't my idea
If I say, scrape a plate clean, does
it situate me as an instruction, or do I develope a kind of insomnia
that has no way out
Your truth is too true to be believeable
by anybody except another exception
That's what I like to be
Exceptional.Chance? A game of chance?
Try using that other door--
What do you mean 'use', when you say
I didn't say use 'it', I specified,
use the door
(Pause- done and bounce off)
I could have opened it, right? I chose
(Pocket, out thing)
Here are different objects wrapped in
I can only remember one of them
Remember? How can you remember what
you haven't seen
Aren't we talking about . . .a flavor?
Ah, now I understand
(Goes, bounces off door)
I'll have one of those objects, please.
Immediately. You make the choice
It's a pebble
I'm going to put this immediately in
You do that
I'd rather not. At least not immediately
Still-- you must wonder what's on the
other side of that door
"The outside . . .world. . .
I already experienced that
You mean, tried the inside-out
I get it
I get it. All I have to do is reapeat
what you say, and we're effectively, in tandum
Is there a weak link in this particular
(goes, bounce on door)
Does that get into a private history
It's a question of learning appropriate
I think I can do that--
Don't be sure-- this language-- doesn't
use the body. What I mean to say is-- there are no DOORS, into
the BODY, through which this language can pass
Maybe its enough if this language collides,
as it were, with the exterioous of the body
Oh? Where's that?
Something just caught my eye when that--
On the other side of that door.
What's that?-- I don't quite follow
you, I'm afraid
Take my hand.
Close my eyes?
I'll lead the wayDid I do this a second
It could be now
It's never what I think it is
Congradulations. I think I'll put the
laural wreath directly on your head for my benifit
For my pleasure
For your pleasure and my benifit
Will I-- wait a minute-- I get this.
I'm going to lead you into the promised land without even knowing
I'm doing it
Anybody would do
But here I am
You're so good at it, because this is
your second time around
Then I guessed right
See why I choose you?
This thing is too tight
Then take it off
Does that make a difference?
I should say "You tell me".
But I won't. I'll just slide where I want to
If I had more control over my mental
What? Where are these things you're
My mental faculties--
--Shh. You name them, they turn against
That's been your experience?
I don't have any. Experiences.
Don't think I'm correcting you, I'm
just turning away from a door that promises nothing
I thought you said 'eat', and I turned
my direction, I mean my head, in the direction of--
What? Head? Direction? Door? You throw
many different ideas at me, and I put up my hands but is it catch
Please, let's share a moment--
I don't want to see that object unless
the lights are out
There's no light in my pocket, it doesn't
But you were about to extract it
Then I won't. I'll just keep my hand
What was it
A lucky coin
I thought it was something else
Then it's ok if I show it
Here it is. Heads or tails
You made it give inconclusive results
Neutral. The kind I like best
Hello-- scrambled eggs
I expected that OTHER door to open
It proved wrong. Here are no scrambled
I must have forgotten to put them on the plate
(They are there, in fact)
That's all right. I'm starved, so I'll eat
Was she in here and was it brief
That's all I can do. Ask
Someimes, when the radio doesn't add
background noise-- I'm in a bad mood
Like when I loose count
Oh, you fill in the blanks, please.
You're biggest mistake was where you
started. Starting at one, SEEMS logical-- but in fact
Where should I start
If you figure that out, you get very
smart very fast
I won't even imagine what that's like
Wait for a number
I was wrong-- all along there were three
servings of scrambled eggs-- ready for delivery
They weren't eaten, you see, when they
should have been eaten
They got cold
Wait a minute. Three servings means
If they're cold-- let's forget about
(To one who left)
Don't say it!
How come there's no radio
Since this is called the Hotel Radio,
I would expect there to be a radio
Did you ring?
Yes. Since this hotel is named The Hotel
Radio-- I'd expect to have a radio in my room
As far as I know-- there's no significance
to the name Radio. It's just the name of the hotel
Yes, but a radio-- should be here. In
I don't understand the SHOPULD sir.
The name is the hotel radio
Yes. But you can't see the name from
inside the hotel.
I can see it on this piece of stationary.
I can see it on this postcard--
There you are
But I can't see a radio
There you are
Can't we do anything about this?
What I mean is-- whatever gets said in this room, passes right through me. No problem/
(Up to door, bounces off)
But you had a collision
It wasn't willed.
So it wasn't a collisionWhat I can bring back from my day exploring the city--
The city might have been endless. On the other hand, it might have been a disappointment.
That is one of the reasons I so miss having a radio in my room.
If there was a radio in my room, I might, now, turn it on for myself,
hear, intuition-wise, what I missed, or lost, in my meticulous exploration,
turned back toward me,
nothing like memory you understand,
but instead like a broken self, a broken me,
and in those cracks,
the wind of real things at last, through a radio--
in here, unheard,
and so. . .I re-imagine a world entire,
living the rest of my life forgetful, asleep,
sensing whatever puspose I picked up when I slid backwards into the wrong door titled "obligation through this door'
and I was in the lost and found department again,
but it could never be decided whether it was the land of the lost,
or the truly,
FOUND at last.
The hotel Radio, and now I'm imagining
Is that why you're holding your temples
Well, my fingers are pressed to my temples,
but that isn't necessary in fact. What I wanted to say was--
--You said you were imagining it
That was a ruse. I just wanted to take
the edge off just saying it
I wanted you to believe me. Not to believe
becessarily what I was saying, but to believe me.
OK. I believe you
The hotel Radio-- exists. Not very far
from a bridge or aquaduct. That kind of structure. And that proximity,
makes it ok that when I picture the hotel radio in my mind's eye,
I see no radio tower or antenna on the roof of the hotel Radio.
It's a railroad bridge, or an aquaduct
Its as if that substitutes for the transmitter
that isn't there
Right. Things arrive or depart along
the directional thrust of that structure. So the actual radio
aparatus, gets folded inside another structure. Even if the trains
no longer come. Even if the water no longer flows through the
plumbing of the hotel radio.
Do you ever hear the trains at night?
I don't think so.
When you approach the hotel Radio and
see the hotel sign---
The hotel sign just says "Hotel".
The name, hotel Radio is visible on the brick wall that rises
without windows to the right of the enterence, set back over the
first three floors, painted on the wall though in letters that
have faded considerably. Hotel Radio.
Then it's possible, since, as you point
out, the letters have faded. that this is no longer the hotel
Radio, but was-- once upon a time.
You see the startionary on the table.
It says hotel Radio on the top of each
sheet of writing paper
Left over from the past?
I don't think so. After a day when I've
written many letters, and exhausted the supply-- the next day,
inevitably, the supply is replaced.
It could even be that the painted sign
hotel Radio refers-- to some other Hotel, calling attention to
the hotel Radio elsewhere, as a possible plcae of residence, even
You've seen the postcards
They're just postcards
Hotel Radio, they say. And the photograph
is a photograph of this hotel
Yes. Cheap photographs distort reality, to a certain extent-- but this is the hotel Radio
(enter, with radio)
I thought you might like this
Thank you very much
(Plug in. Goes)
Thank you again!
Did she hear that?
I was late. I'm sorry, but I was late
Don't be sorry
But I am
You couldn't help being late
Let's go to dinner
And when we get back-- we can listen
to the radio, and hope--
Hope against hope
Maybe there'll be. . .good things to
Talk or music
A little of both
Maybe we won't be able to tell the difference
Oh, unless we drink too much-- we'll
be able to tell the difference.I don't tip my hat to any of you
I'm here alone
I don't lift a finger.
Suppose I asked for an explination of
everything that happened in my life. You couldn't provide it.
Right. I couldn't provide it.
I could only get a half-assed exolination
from somebody in your catagory
I didn't know I was in catagories.
You was-- are-- am.
I was-- are-- am
Was-- are-- am
Was-- are-- am.
Hungry for experience?
Hungry for the truth.
This must be where I lived previously.
If I dare reach towards this radio--
I find that the hand, trembles. And that flight, biscets any clear images in my head.
Let's see if I fall.
Try taking a step
Bring me something to lean on
Then it won't be a fair test
Take a step
Don't be afraid. A test is an opportunity!
I'm getting something to lean on!
Can I demonstrate my own self as an
Look. I have acquired another book which I shall never read. So I have purchased, not knowledge, but ignorance.
And somehow, that puts me closer in
touch with the truth that is at least MY truth.
I suspect it's a kind of laziness
Oh, I suspect you're right. But what
are the options. Either I fight laziness, or I give way to laziness.
You seem to have made your choice
Put it better. I have been chosen
I think laziness turns against you eventually.
I've already done so
It IS possible to act contrary to one's
Perhaps that's cowardice. Perhaps giving
way to ones destiny is. . .well, the spiritual path, so long as
awareness is till super-awake.
Why did you bring home another book
you won't read
Sometimes I cheat
I look into such a book. I open it at random and read a few sentences, to see if I'm capable of surrender.
Usually-- that doesn't happen
Can I prepare the couch?
Isn't it prepared?
I'd put out a pillow
No-- I'll just collapse on it as is.
Now, cover me with books--
(exit, enter. Done. He rises)
If I rise from the sea-- am I barefly
capable of doing so two times in succession
Of you, I think it would have to be
said, you breathe better when it's machine assisted
Excellent, except I'm too lazy to even
acquire for myself such a machine
I'll be beyond this game, soon enough
I'll do no more battle with you
Then, off to the races
Join me there. First, collapse in the
way you want to collapseWhen I'm covered with books, as I was
As you are
True. I still am
I have an invention. Open the chest
(done, book suit out and on)
This goes where I go
It gives one the impression, sir, you
are well read
Quite the opposite-- axcess to these
books is limited, plus--
You could contort your body to do reading
That's hardly the point
What is the point
I risk damaging these books, through
the sheer activity of passing through life. Notice how awkward
You mean you've anticipated (Book suit)
I can't get out of this
A vefy comfortable situation
As I said, therefore
My reading matter accompanies me.
But it gets destroyed, potentially,
I'd rather concentrate elsewhere
Yes. The mind CAN be an illuminating
beacon and therefore, directed elsewhere
What an attractive disguise
My curiosity is peaked. To me, that's
It's awkwardness needent be figured
into the equasion?
It would be uncomfortable to make use
of that liberally displayed reading matter
It must be for show only
That's the question
Have a seat
Of course. Catastrophy
So what happened interesting today to
There's so much to know, and so little
time to explore.
Might as well give up hope in that direction
What gets substituted?
You took the words right out of my mouth
There they are-- millions of them.
Yes,-- but, nesting, as it were. Unhatched,
as it were
Do those chickens--
Don't wake them up. Ot spoils the effect
All along, I said-- good effect
Well, in the limited time available--
a good effect here or there seems the appropriate best one can
Let's get a divorce
We have no kind of perminant relationship
Yes. I know. So-- let's get a divorce
Let's gfet a redundent, divorce
Let's get a simply beside the point, no was to tie it to any realities in the environment, divorce-- which like any other word can have brand new implications if it's just banged against hard enough so a little blood starts flowing
(Get brooms, wack)
I feel . . .like I'm in another time and place.
Yes. This is OK. This is excellent!
This is excellent!
(Can I designate myself as an existing
thing?)Who can move-- when I enter a room, nobody--
You mean somebody's there?
I mean, I casually collapse
Something said is something forgotten
Pass over-- I mean, pass a hand over
Can a word do a word's work
Safe with words-- less than safe with
people. Let me correct that
Safe with words?
No. Words like broken promises. People
like promises that no matter what happens-- are not broken. Ever.
They stay people
Words stay words
No. They erase themselves. They flip
flop. Right now you don't understand. But the minute you vanish,
and if you're lucky you WILL vanish, then you WILL believe me.
Do you remember on a certain occasion
when I re-opened my eyes
I don't know how to exist on this level
where I exist
I bend toward you, but I don't bend.
So what's really happening. I must be breaking into a million
Try that again
One more of my million pieces
Let's turn an even into a new flavor
Oh? Flavor of the month?
Flavor of the moment
Do you think it works--
That talking a new way is really being
a new way
No-- it's to stop 'being'.
If I really talk a new way-- then I
don't have to go on existing
What window are you going to jump from
No. Here I am
Did I hear you say "here I am"?
Well, you heard me but I don't think
you understood me
I must have tied a rope around my own
muzzle. I mean muzzled myself, and of course the rope was imaginary--
except, I'll tell you where you can find one. In that drawer
Don't draw me any pictures--
Look at these fingers; they can't handle any good drawing mechanisms. But they can, go over the mouth like an umbrella.
I see, it's keeping the rain off. No, I mean, I don't hear any rain
(fingers into ears.
(Music up, out)I try, obviously, to
see important colors in the backgroud of my efforts to become
Oh? Wake up?
Did I say I was walking on grass, or
on water that lies an inch or two over the brown soil?
I think your words are turning into
Please. Show me your hands.
Now, put them on my face
Don't say how, because that starts something
vibrating in my entire body
Couldn't I approach, talking to you.
. .instead of talking to myself
Ah, that means stop talking
No, I want to talk--
From the inside or the outside
Both at once
Look! --who's talking
It's going back and forth between us
Excuse me, did this clock just say something?
Oh no, I think you seriously misintrepreted
What did you hear
Something about-- oh my arms are tired,
but I think there was a confusion between an arm and a tongue
Now. Let go
(Pause, and done)
Now-- what were you saying? Ah. Cat got your tongue.
(other looks at watch)
My watch stopped
It says three fifteen and that's obviously
I thought you were trying to communicate
Yes, but something else started pre-empting
Look! -- who's talking? It was, alas,
the end of the morning. Another morning in which the sun burned
into the sidewalks and building fronts like benevolent truth.
Truth, so often wearning the cloak
of one who named himself avenger-- and the smile played over the
lips in a way that made the eyes distort (did the seeing also
shift? The sun was, in these early morning hours, pmpervious to
such shifts. But now, noon upon us, the 'alas' found depths to
sink into, never again extractable.
The light, which in its oblique angle,
had as it were, kissed, now was weight, descending as it were
What before, through obliqueness,
had urged into action and invention (at least for the mind, that
true light receptor) now as the weight of weights (too light for
measurement) pressed the expanding brain-mind-eye axis into the
lower parts of the body (and recall, location here is a fiction
un-traceable) and that body-- the world now-- had, in the dream
of home, no home.
Noon, and what could be imagined as
flight only-- left behind its true connection to the true life
and so life and breath separated, and the body did its things--
and the mind did its separate things, and that unconnectedness
was the fault, and where the crack in the noon universe widened--
there, entered the face, contorted, of the self dream that covered
with the blanket of who I am, the true king, who I am not.)What
is here, problematic Paul, is that there is no window to the outside
Light is here, but it does not ednter
Then I should close my eyes
A window could be cut in one of the
One that is between the outside, and
Did you say yes?
Did you say . . .some variety of an
Yes. That window which is something
through which one looks.
He saw, there, his image-- his self--
the seen, not a reflection, but a date, written like a depth.
And then the window-- re-reflected,
sliced, him-like, into the world and the world itself, lit, withdrew
in new intimacyTry one foot after the other.
I'll be walking
Right. You'll be walking
Will this give me a superior way to
cross considerable territory? --Wait a minute. I'd rather answer
that myself.What is trying to happen in this play? Life is trying
to re-form itself-- still recognizable-- on a slightly different
plane-- or tilted, the plane of normal, every-day life, tilted
slightly, so that other factors-- present as parts of the admitted
vast universe of being, can slide into, amidst, recognizable for
brief moments at least, as a variation in texture of normal living
. . .sliding into and shifting slightly, open windows in the texture
of normal, everyday life of social interaction.
What is happening in this play? The laws of life are re-written. Life is lived on a premise that changes. That new premise, discoverable in tiny adjustments that are visible, moment by moment, rather than in the bulk generalization of a narrative line-- for there is no story, other than the story of this real moment, which pivots, under the blow of yearning-- the yearning for a glimpse of that other world which is this world, obscured by habit.Welcome!
Let me tell you a story in the center
of which, I hide a personal message
Excuse me. But how will we be able to
recognize this private message?
(why do you say "we", when
this message is intended for just one of you?)
(Why is this message hidden?
So that its decipherment will insure perminant value to the one
who deciphers it)
etcIs this up your alley?
I should say yes-- whatever the definition
turns out to be
That's a no
I heard hesitation--
My kind of committment. If I don't hesitate,
the juice doesn't get squeezed out of the appropriate dry rock.
What an accomplishment you expect of me and-- surprise of surprises--
I pull it off.
I hardly know what happened
Making it invisible enough was my genius. I was just in a minute or so of real life passing.
Quite up my alley, as the vernacular
has it, but then again, what is vernacular? We communicate
We can't help it
You know it. I know it. We just had
to spread it a little, like butter over a little stretch of time
that now has been totally devoured and let me remind you: you
are what you eat
Right. Invisible stuff.
The moment passed
That's for me to find out
I wonder if my foot changes sizes. At
any event-- now it's back to normal
Ah, the future longs for an encounter
that never takes place
Ah, but it's the failure of trying,
the trying that gets deflected, thrown off course, such tries
as it were de-tried: something that's out of your control, sir.
Then I mustn't even think about it
But you do
But I mustn't
But you can't avoid it
I can try
It won't work
And we both smile
(Turns, hits chair)
That doesn't count I'm afraid
Can you read my mind?
Certainly. Can you read mine?
(Moves and looks)
I thought something just fell out of
What an odd way to put it
--I can read your thoughts. Now-- you
say-- I can read your thoughts.
I can read your thoughts
Yes and no. But of course I said that
No. Thank you.
(awkward pause. Move)The trees bent,
not visible this bend, but the street, sidewalk, steps, reflecting
the slight undulation, over and over was captured, when Marie
said 'Hold me. Not an embrace, you understand (he understood)
but a hold onto the center that does not pivot.'
At that command, he let go, laughing,
and re-joined the life of the street, thinking a life was wasted
while in fact, it served the purpose pf things.
The Hotel Radio rose into the air, while
the light that surrounded it, cradled a voice that spoke like
second light, and the warm arms of that voice, unfolding into
the reaches of the night, covered vast, vast, is a direction
that has none, and height that travels towards a center and so
is in no direction also.
Vast vast, and a hundred lives flowed
into that center and more, but those hundred lives, leaving not
yet all those places in the scheme of things, meant that the center
was now everywhere, and the beacon on top of the Hotel Radio turned,
smiled, and returned into the shape of the human being, one among
many, who had the courage, merely, to imagine it.If I went to
a window that had been eliminated, and looked out--
It was eliminated
Looking out a window was eliminated
I thought you said the window was.
Of course. I forgot on purpose. Then,
this is ten minutes later, I covered my eyes
Did you say I had optical illusions
I said this was ten minutes later
Not anything, because moments pass and
Is this an effective moment?
Oh yes. This is a very effectrive moment.
Or was. Look at it through a window
(Both cover eyes)His own way to a better
life, he didn't make clear to himself-- but it hovered, in front
of his eyes, like a light.
Let me wave a substitute
(Picks up lamp)
That should do the trick. Therefore
I release my inhibitions
I see nothing less inhibited
Suppose I drop my pants
Of course I won't. It's too silly
But it would be a sign of being uninhibited
Put down the lamp
Put down the lamp!
God damit, I said put down the lamp!
Does that improve somebody's life?
Well, on the other hand, my arms were
Then I guess, in a very real sense,
it improved your life
I accept your gratitude
Humm, what a gracious gesture
Oh no, THIS is my gracious gesture--
Are you moving something?
I could easily hallucinate a movement,
but I don't
I don't either.In a certain hotel,
a certain radio was absent.
Once upon a time, each room contained a radio.
Now, no radio in no room.
In a certain hotel
plans were made
from a tower on the roof of the hotel,
But such plans never came to fruition.
Nevertheless, the name of this hotel
was the Radio Hotel.
How often has a name been less than appropriate.
In this case, one could understand
why the name was chosen, even though it was no longer appropriate.
Having once been, to a certain extent, an appropriate name
There was now a pause
Through that pause, thoughts from another time
Bled, leaving the residue of a name.
No blood stained the walls of the Radio Hotel.
Silence, radio reigned.
And the Radio Hotel
closed inside itself
The lost proclivity it broadcast
those who passed or entered
or passed through as guests
Radio Hotel. (Hotel Radio, hello, radio
Can I help?
No. But help.
It's one of my favorite words. No. It's
my favorite word.
I help whenever I get help
The more times you can use the word
help in a sentence, the more it helps.
Help yourself to the word help, which
is how I help myself
Help yourself to some fruit
I don't think I should eat right now
One of the most potent ideas I ever
had, ever, was the idea that in the center of the fruit was a
pit, and the pit was the radio in the center of the fruit. And
the whole fruit. . .helps, the radio in the center of the fruit.
My ear, helps
My ear was help also
Does this help? My ear helps
Have some fruit now
Eat it, or let it turn into the radio
that it is
In the Hotel Radio, the fruit that is
placed in bowels which sit on ssmall tables in each room-- no
radios in rooms, but fruit in rooms, and in the center of the
fruit, is a radio
I imagine walking down the street and
seeing the letters painted on the stone wall of the building I
pass to spell the words "hotel Radio". Then I imagine
a round fruit-- just it's image, painted on a stone wall. And
I imagine a ray of energy, travelling through the stone and emerging
from the stone to fly over the whole city. This helps. This imagining
this thing helps
What does it help
It helps me. If I try to say what it
helps-- me-- that separates me from myself and that does not help.
So I do not explain why it helps, even to myself. I just say and
know, it helps. Which is much like being in, or traveling towards,
the Hotel Radio. Just remembering it, even from inside one of
its rooms, and I don't know if there are many such rooms or only
a few-- but it helps.
Hello, this is a part of the hotel radio, and it helps.
_______________ (This scene, it
would seem there are many waits before a speech, in which
one, grasps another 'angle')
Those wings are invisible to most people,
but I see them
--Let's go out into the street
There are too many busses
--I don't like to ride in a bus, I like
to avoid a bus
It's the noise I find objectionable
--So. We go into no street
I have a nostalgia
--All streets or certain streets
The answer is written on my fingers--
--why on your fingers.
What I mean is, sometimes I'm able to
write things I had no ability to say verbaly. So I'll reach for
this piece of paper-- but I have no pencil.
Ah-- you'll have to rely on talking
Did I ever tell you about a relative?
I thought you had none
That would be impossible. I couldn't
just spring into the world, like something that manifest itself
all by itself.
Can you still see my wings?
Do you imagine having your own?
Give me a pencil
Then I might as well tear up this piece
Don't tear up that piece of paper
There's something written on it important
Let me see
Tear it up
No, I'll just keep it
Do I know you?
We were going into the street
--That's where Ive just been
On a bus?
Well, I tried imagining secret lives
for everybdy on the bus. Then I came here.
Now you can imagine my secret life
I'm not very good at it
(Pause, unfolds paper)
When YOU said nothing, that's when
I took it seriously
I'm here to make changes
How much later
Well, that's just to confuse you. What
I should have said, is-- was-- it's already happened
I thought something was different in
The furniture was rearranged
Right. The bed used to be over there
And this table, by the other wall--
It's hard remembering
(a) Should I bring in the suitcases?
I forgot all about them
Mine's not very heavy
Well--we'll find out about that, won't we
I don't know if you should trust such
a recent acquaintance with our suitcases
I'd like to know more about what happened
to you on the bus
Just because you won't ride in one--
Of course-- maybe that's why I'm so
Well, I got on, paid my fare
--Was it crowded?
You didn't tell me yet whether you got
I was coming to that
She stepped up into the bus, she paid
The bus makes a peculiar sound when
the engine accelerates, but the sound if different-- sounds different,
when heard from the interious of the bus, then it does through
an open window when one is sitting in one's room and the sound
of the bus passing at the corner is accompanied by other sounds--
Birds, singing in the trees that line
the street-- yes, I noted that evocative combination of noises
and for me, that's when a bus is at its best.
I've dreampt about it
It's not like that at all when you're
inside a bus
(enter with four bags)
This is what I found
It looks right
The one that weighs the least is mine
Are you sure about that?
Oh yes. I tested
(Puts them down. music rises. Open,
pull out some things. On, a jacket and a sweater. Embrace. Angel
"There was a sound of wings beating in air, and an angel his his face in his hands. Because human beings were at work, and in spite of passing joys-- the end of the story would evoke great sadness, which one could easily foretell, but chose rather-- to look elsewhere"
Would you say that the future is far
away, or very near
It can't be both
It's both. It's just a few minutes from
now, a few seconds from now, but also-- at the same time it's
years and years away.
Oh, I understand the logic, but on the
other hand I find it hard to accept, and I don't think I'm wrong
There's something I don't want to say--
but now I think hiding it solves nothing
Look at me
You look frightened
What are you going to tell me
When I looked in the suitcase, I saw
something was missing
Do you think it was stolen?
Do you think something is missing from
Look what I found in the corridor
That's my watch
(a) I have something I'd like to give you as a present
(Holds out box)
Thank you-- but this is a lady's watch.
I don't think it would be appropriate for me to wear it
Well, you could keep it in your pocket
and only refer to it when you had the need to tell time
Then I'll accept
We didn't know if you'd accept
Time will tell
It already told
Right, the future's already arrived
Well, one possible future. I mean, there
do seem to be many. On and on
--oh, by the way-- I saw some more suitcases I must have overlooked.
(exits, other to door to watch. re-enter)
Well, just one. But it's a big one.
I don't think we'll open this one
That's up to you
It'll be nice to have it just sitting
there, knowing that some day we'll just-- . . . open it
Ah, that'll be far in the future
Time for me to go
Where do you catch the bus?
You ride the bus?
You get it at the corner
I suppose it'll be self-evident
Our thoughts will be with you
(Embrace both. Go)
Let's just put the suitcase, back in
I'll do it
Well, it's yours, isn't it?
Mine is this very light one. Which is
now even lighter
(Embrace. Suitcase out, return)
Here's the key-- you should have one
I don't know if that's possible
OK. Whenever you want to come in, just
knock. I'll be here
Good. I have some errends to do now
Why don't you put them off
OK. I was just testing
I passed the test
For you to know, for me to find out
The simplest thing would be for you
to believe me
If it's the simplest thing, --that appeals
Whereas me, on the other hand, I'm the
opposite. If things are just a little bit complicated-- I get
interested, and that's very good for me. Well, I don't know if
it's good for me, but at least it makes me feel better. No too
complicated. Just a littlre complicated.
Just the amount of complication that's
right for you in particular
You hit the nail on the head
Thank you very much
Don't jump to conclusions
Did I?If I lower my head, I end up hitting
my forehead on the edge of the table
--I know. Why lower my head. Is it an
act of prayer-- submission-- weariness--?
I think it's time to take to the streets.
There's nothing here--
Our suitcases. Especially the unopened
I better write this all in my book of
Think of all the bad things that can
happen to a book
The entire book can be destroyed, yes.
Much worse, if a single page gets ripped loose--
Upi took the words out of my mouth
I wouldn't want to risk the falseification
of an entire life
Didn't you say-- writing it in a memory
Yes. But I can't find the book
Here's a book
But that;s a--
--I know. But put down your notes in some of the blank spaces
See? There's lots of room in which to
Could I ask you for a light?
You don't smoke
No, I don't
You don't need more light to read or
write or see anything
What I see is here at the moment
Why did you ask for a light?
It flew out of me before an explination
I got that
Now-- you get it
No, originally when it happened, or
else I would have forgotten about it completely
Lets see if we can find anything about
that-- clarification for instance, someplace in this book
Did you write that?
--No. I haven't written anything in
any of the blank spaces.
Let's forget about it
It's not a good book
It could still hold secrets
Oh, it probably does
Let me just store this in one of my suitcases
al-- here's my watch
I thought I'd misplaced it
Put it on then--
No, I'm already wearing one. So I'll
put it back in this suitcase
With the book
Rightr. With the book
Now you don't have anything to write
I'll be ok in here
Let me look
(Looks at head)
There's no mark
(Pause. To mirror)
How strange. Where you see nothing,
I see a whole world
Shhhh-- let's not spoil the effect
You like my concentration
Too late. You broke my concentration
That's why I said, let's take to the
streets-- get it? When you can't concentrate, you might as well
try something else
No. It's too late.
Oh well, I'll see you later.
to see yourself. Try to really look--
Let me look into that mirror
You mean these two mirrors?
I can only look into one at a time
Your problem is that you can only look
into one at a time
I can move my head back and forth as
rapidly as possible to try to see both at once
Interesting-- it looks like you're saking
your head to say 'No'
Which is better Rabbi, no or yes
(Rabbi? Rabbi? RABBI? etc)
Ah, that must depend on ther circumstances
Yes, but what are the circumstances
You tell me
I'm here, trying to get . . .well, I'm
trying to get wisdom from you
I felt the need for a long time, but
I didn't act on it1-1-7-2-3-4-5-8-8-
I have six fingers. Is this true
You have ten fingers
No. I have six fingers. Now-- I have
Youi have ten fingers. From the beginning,
I spoke the truthFar away, a door opens
The seven is inside the three. That
means, three rules-- being more prime. Closer to the one
But the three is inside the seven, meaning
that seven includes three s it includes evenything up to
and including seven
So. Three can be a limit. The world
or it can be a series within a greater
thing, well within the limit of that greater thing.I can lie about
the world or I can tell the truth about the world. But I won't
know which I am doing.
(Is this the devil's work)?Suppose,
just suppose-- I were to speak, not about the real world in which
I live and experience so-called real life. Suppose, I were to
speak only about this artificial second reality in which I exist.
This. . .play, this: literary, theatrical object. Suppose I were
to lay my head on the table as if it were a real table
But it is a real table
Correct. But it is also, not a real
table. Correct a second time? Can one be correct a second time?
I will assume one can be correct many
times in a row
That would be incorrect
When correction is multiplied, something
else enters the equasion
What is that something else?
By telling you, I'd be incorrect
This is getting us no where
Are you sure?
I'm sure you'll say I, or we, can't
be sure about any particular thing. Which is true in a sense but
rather a banal truth on the other hand
Ah. Banal because is isn't experienced
How can anything be experienced if it
happens in a play rather than in real life
This isn't a play
Yes it is
How do you know
You said so
I take it back
Oh, that changes everything--
How could this be a play if it recognizes
itself as such?
I don't know. I can't chart it. I can't
really understand your question
I'll repeat it. How can this be a play
if it recognizes itself as such?
That changes nothing.
That changes everythingOn a certain
night, a jew rolled into a room.
I believe this lamp tells my life story
What happens when the sun rises, and
the lamp is turned off
Oh, that's a local effect, only. It
I have something to show you
Do you have any idea what this is?
A man, dressed as a woman
(It is in fact, a woman dressed as
You misrepresent me
It's my mistake then
Why am I seated
I didn't know that was the opportunity
It's your opportunity
Have a seat
The best seat is occupied
You better reconsider
This is a woman after all. Something
managed to convince me
Oh no. Hearing that, I'd like to reach
for my revolver
Is that where I keep my revolver?
Look at this
That's a humanoid doll!
I'll bet it's not dressed
Outside is inside
What does that mean
Outside is inside-- what does that mean?
It mean, of course--
--that the inside of the body has a
very intimate relationship with the outside of the body
This is a doll
This is a person dressed inappropriately
Maybe the doll is a copy of the person
Maybe the person is a copy of the doll
Let's take the doll apart and find out
On the other hand, I think we better
wrap the doll in newspaper and put it someplace secret
I knew there was a secret
Not yet, but we're making one come into
Wasn't it more secret BEFORE it came
No. To be secret it has to be in existence,
What I like--
--Secrets. I like secrets
Then you must be a happy person
Let me show you how happy I am
(Takes coin from pocket and flips)
What would have happened if it was tails?
It would have been the same thing. That's the secretI bet it was
that attracted my attention and made
me loap ioto the main arena
I bet it was
my way of lending tone to a discussion
that coughed up the antidote to the
poison professor who creamed my hair.
I bet it was
who did me with a versimilitude that
shocked the expectent arbiters of taste
I bet it was
Who got lost in a way that did favors
to specifically the golden haired ones I wanted to pleasesomebody
somebody cooled out
somebody fell in glue
somebody got drunk on ice
somebody dashed backwards into career
catastrophy.Let me show you something
Dear Max, the aroma here-- or should
I say-- the atmosphere, is so extraordinary. It makes me think
I have arrived at the hotel radio
But you have.This is the hotel radio
Is this true
Do you mean-- is this real?
Aren't those the same querstions?
I don't trust my own answer
Nevertheless-- it's going around and
around your head like a cloud of smoke
What goes around my head
The famous answer you didn't trust
Is it like a circle of words?
No. Like a circle of smoke
Then it vanishes
Like the music in the hotel radio
There is no music
You and I don't hear it
Well-- isn't it called, the hotel radio?
Yes, it is called the hotel radio
Then it is still called the hotel radio,
even if I am not sure
Look around the room, know for sure,
this is the hotel radio
Now I know for sure
I vanished from where I was and came
to the hotel radio
What do you mean you vanished?
Going from one place, then putting in
an appearance in another place
Do you smoke?
No. Take my hand
Do you smoke?
No. If smoke circles my head, it's an
Is there such a thing as a verbal illusion?
At the hotel radio, that would be quite
appropriate.Let me show you the important part of my personality
Please, don't fall over me
Outside of error, I have no gift from
Ah, there are so many truths. Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds and. . .There are many ways to say the one things, which is-- ignorance. But there is a demand to fill the space held by ignorance.
An empty room.
And there is a demand to fill that room.
Perhaps it's walls might be decorated. Perhaps objects might be
placed, filling that room. Perhaps speech, activity, sentiment,
paradox. . .
But there is an empty room,
and a demand
and ignorance: complete ignorance
One can dare the ultimate, and do nothing
and respond not to that demand
(enter one dressed like king/knight)
Why are you dressed like that
I don't dress myself. This was the way
in which I was, by someone or somebody, dressed
I don't know
Make a guess
It would be a guess
What filled this room
What do I see
Why did there come to be mistakes
There was a demand-- no more ignorance--
and somebody obeyed that demand
I never obey
Why are you dressed like that
I don't know
Didn't somebody insist?
I don't know
Didn't you enter dressed like that because
somebody insisted, or requested it at least
I don't know
I think you can guess
Why would I want to guess. Why wouldn't
I just say "I don't know" and be done with it
Because-- something else drives you
Ah, but I am not victemized by such a demand
Is that why my appearance is so powerful?
I don't think it's so powerful
Then I'm wrong. Then I'm ignorant of
the effect I produce
How did you come to be dressed like
I don't know
Have a seat
No thank you
No thank you
Do you know how to take a seat?
Of course I do
Then you're not ignorant in regart to
taking a seat
I am ignorant
There's no arguing with you
Of course not
Have a seat
(Sits)When life coagulates-- then and
then only, thought stops.
In the course of normal activity, there
are windows that open suddenly. Thought stops. Something else
uses the mechanism of thought.
A sudden chord in music can produce this effect.
It doesn't happen often, but when it does
the thought mechanism
is used by the heart.
That's a bad way of putting it
but, the search for a better way of putting it
wipes it out.
Along the banks of a river. A man walks.
He throws his papers into that river. He crosses his eyes. He
crosses his arms over his chest, and watches the papers that lie
on the surface of that river float, on the water, on the surface
of the water, and he says to himself-- I too, have been tossed
onto a surface through which I do not sink, but float, elsewhere
to the place where I do sink.
Then he jumps into the river and sinks
to its depths, which means disappears-- and the arms and eyes
uncross, beacsue they disappear also.
And the rock says knock, knock, I've
just arrived at the important city and I have much to do.
Sometimes, it comes upon a piece of
paper blowing through the streets, glances at the piece of paper,
and then moves on to other things in its throughts, not knowing
from whence it came, or to whgere it goes.
But on a particular day, a piece of
paper lying on the street catches the eye of a young man who picks
it up to read what is written on it. He reads this story, this
very story. And it changes his life, just a little of course,
as many things do.
And he goes in search of the next thing that will change his life, just a little, and he succeeds, because everything does, and somebody says-- well, that's what life is. And rests his or her arm on the stone balastrade and looks, for a while, into the river that dreams of someplace else.What he wanted to do was to say something about life that would really be about life. But WHY.
WHY did he want to do this.
Why not let life be as it was, lifelike in and of itself, or was it.
Was life likelike without something being said about it that was life-like but different in that it included the now saying about it which was something in addition to life
but was it
or was it a very real part of life both before and after it happened.Ignorance. The room entitled-- Ignorance
I gave it a name
And it exists in true being
This room is named ignorance.
The room is ignorance. Its emptiness is ignorance
Why do I feel the need to put such a thing into words-- and the words are awkward, but that awkwardness of the words twists into a kind of satisfaction-- why is that
If the words extend, just a bit more-- they make a bridge I stand on.
At least, my head stands on the bridge. Not that a head stands-- but now it does.
The emptiness in the head--
accepted, so that words can grow and be solid like a rom is-- or the walls of a room, against which one can hurl one's body.Words mean that
things encounter one another.
Things extend through time
on their pwn paths.
Through words, they meetIs this thing
in my head, a jewel
Perhaps it is no jewel
What thing in your head--
Obviously, I'm imagining it
Close your eyes
That's not how I imagine things--
Oh? Most of us see mental pictures more
clearly with the eyes closed
Look what I found in the real world
(Goes to chest)
Ah, is this a representation of what
you claim to have found inside your head
I don't think so
Why show it to me
Look how light bounces around inside
But the same thing happens outside here in the world
(Turns about, indicates)
I suppose it does
Does this agitation inside my head MEAN anything?
I woke up
I went into the street
I looked up at the sky
I shielded my eyes against the light
I swallowed a glass of water
I lost consciousness for a moment
Then it returned
I know that I'd forgotten many things that happened.
Trying to remember, I allowed my body to move in various directions
Towards no goal.
I fell over myself in multiple directions.
Beautiful I said, beautiful
Remembering nothing, nevertheless I
I chose the right word
It grew, in a variety of directions
What's this in my head?
Does it hurt?
Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it feels wonderful. Over the course of time it does everything conceiveable. Let me show you something.
(Chest, a jewel)
But you've already given me one
I must have quite a collection
OK. I can imagine
Close your eyes
Does that help the process
I maintain it helps the process
(Looks in drawer. Jewel unwrapped)
No. I don't think it changes anything.
Let's collect all the available trinkets and put them back into
That feels better doesn't it?
I don't think it--
--Shhh. I know the answerLook at this
It's your watch
It's something else
It's the time your watch says
Can you be sure it's accurate?
I have one of my own
Can you be sure it's accurate?
If I don't check it out--
--If I don't, I can have considerable
Look at this
Gladly. Since it's not mine, I don't
have to take it extra seriousIf a particular piece of furniture
in this room moves by itself-- then I call that piece of furniture,
the fulcrum. The furniture around which non-moving furniture pivots.
It would seen the non-moving furniture
Try sitting in one such piece of furniture
Try having a very different kind of
Who moved!Let me show you something
(Slowly points to nose)
Should I do that?
I think I'd like to wipe my hands clean
with my hankerchief
Ah, your nose SHINES in the center of
your face, Paul.
That's not desirable, is it?
It's my way of speaking
I have a private way of speaking
Look at this
You point to your nose, but it doesn't
seem to me to shine more than other noses
(Points to wall)
Look at this
Maybe I'm supposed to look at the finger
that's doing the pointing rather than at the thing that it's pointing
That's one thing too many
Is my nose still shining?
Oh, there's no end to it's shining
Does that mean if I turned off the lights in this room, things would still be visible?
What the nose does. . .is perception.
Just like other parts of the body
Is it still shining
I can see I don't know very much about
I'd like to appreciate my own abilities
Did I show you this photograph that
was taken of you maybe four or five years ago?
Where did you get that
You know --I can't remember?
My nose is shining in that photograph
Yes it is
And I never knew
Can I take another, now?
I'd rather not
I don't want to have to deal with any
possible difference between the two photographs
There are bound to be differences
I know. I don't want to deal with that
It doesn't matter. I don't have a camera
Unfortunately, I do
--Then don't tell me about it
Is it still shining?
I'm not sure. I've never been sure.
Let's get a second opinion
No thank you
I'll just deal with it-- without second
It's shining.Watcxh this
Does it make you dizzy?
I'm not sure
Ah-- betwixt and between
You must be
Yes. It's called dizziness
I could imagine being less dizzy then
I am now, which heretofore I've considered the state of not being
Get your bearings from my internal gyroscope
I'd rather do that
Do that then what?
I don't know yet
Could we get as far away from each other
as possibe and still be in this room
I think so
Let me show you the contents of my pockets
(Empties inside out-- nothing)
Now I know what made me dizzy
I travel light
It is light in here
Ordinarily that helps one get his bearings
or her bearings. But in this case--
That's becausre of our peculiar attitude towards light
If it's really light, it reaches the
point where it doesn't increase visibility at all
Wouldn't you like to sit
Why would I
It would make it more convenient to
protect your eyes
Why is that
Your hands would be free
They're free now
They'd be more free. Try it out
--No-- don't get closer to me!
If I sit in the chair, I have to.
Then don't sit. Just use your hands
as if you were sitting, to cover your eyes
I always said it was possible
I didn't see it--
I didn't say I wanted to do it
You see how easy that makes it? Now
you can move closer to me and it won't matter
Have you also covered your eyes?
Well, that's my business, isn't it?
I have no way of knowing
But you make guesses
I do. But my guesses oscilate back and
forth so fast between the possibilities that nothing gets guessed
Now, takes you hands off
See? It's the same effect
For all you know, I could have moved to the middle of the room.
(Other turns, first retreats)
No no--don't move.
What were we talking about?
See? Everything that happens-- is bound
to repeat itself sooner or later.
That accounts for the dizziness
Once you know that-- is it OK?
OK (curtain, little statue behind. Opened)
Take a look
Is that supposed to be me?
I didn't notice the resemblence though
I noticed the family resemblence
Then it's supposed to be me
Nothing of the kind
Why do I have to look at it.
Ah, a solution would be to turn the
head in a contrary direction
An evasive maneuver
What it accomplished was turning everything
I set eyes on into a mirror
What coomplished that?
Making me look
It doesn't look like you
There's a particular mental orientation
that makes everything encounterable. . .a self image. Family resemblences
I'm sorry I made you look
I would have done the same thing
Should we cover it?
Now there's not much point
Why would you have done the same thing?
I see the family resemblence
Yes, but why did you say "I would
have done the same thing"?
You gave me the idea
Yes, but if I hadn't, you wouldn't have
had the idea
Yes, things would have been reversed.
I'd have had the idea, and I would have given the idea to you.
By doing it.
I see. Things would have been reversed
So it's as if they are
Yes What's in plain sight that I've
I have no idea, since it's hidden
I don't miss it
It's in plain sight, but you don't know
what it is
I've decided it's that chair
That isn't what I hid in plain sight
Let me correct you. Until I decided
to focus on it, it was hidden from me, so the choice was mine
The choice is still mine
Suppose I sit
I guess anything is possible
Just the opposite
OK. What's the object you hid in plain
You won't believe this, but I've forgotten
what it was
You said everything was possible
Yes, it's possible you forgot, but it's
also possible that's not true. So I better make an inventory.
This chair, that lamps--
Wait a minute
Don't go so fast. Consider the chair before you move on to other possibilities
That's what I hid
Is that in retrospect
There's no way to avoid rfetrospect,
I don't think it was supposed to be
Well-- what then
Hold your forehead
Now say 'retrospect'
But say it while holding your forehead
Whatever way comes naturally
This doesn't come naturally
'Retrospect'. But there's nothing natural
What do you think it is I hid in plain
How can it be when you already confirmed
--Do something that comes naturally
(Releases hands, sits back)
At this moment I'm only aware of probably
ten per cent of the material that fills this room-- you have a
wide open field
I'd say YOU have a wide open field
Whatever you hide-- I decide not to
Then it stays hidden
That's OK by me
That's OK by me tooI had the idea that--
No ideas, please
What it a dream?
I don't want to move right now
I'm already moving. Let's say that I'm on top of that table.
(Table moves center)
Crouching down as if huddled in a storm,
and the table itself is floating over a kind of ocean in a kind
This is a story
Yes. This is a story
You're crouching on the top of that
Wait a minute-- there I am, squeezed
into that corner.
Now you're at two places, crouching
on top of the table, and squeezed into the corner--
Flat up against the ceiling, floating
with my back against it.
I bet this proliferation is going to
Yest it is.
How did I get to be a person who's right
a hundred per cent of the time
It must be my help
If I'm in every possible place and every
possible position all at the same time--
--The rom is chocked full of your various
--I wanted to make you be right a hundred per cent of the time
Didn't you say 'no more ideas'?
You were right
If I'm everyplace at once, there's no
more room for an idea
But if you're everyplace at once--
This is just my being hypothetical
--Where am I.
Oh, you're not hypothetical at all.
It must be that when one person is hypothetical,
the other person has to be non-hypothetical.
Can we switch?
Why don't you put the table back in
What are you doing here
Isn't that table in the wrong place?
Wait a minute
Nobody move. . . . Nobody move.
I could bet on it. Your heart goes out
That's on the outside
Of course it's on the outside
I pictured up a quick image of your
face in a distant mirror--
And the expression told me all
I think those mirrors have been taken
out of the room so that they could benifit some other room
I think so too
I think about the great benifit in other
rooms because we-- you and I-- are both leading our thoughts in
It seems to me a miscalculation has
been made, a slight, falling over the edge--
Ah, That's what I hoped for.
--Because, that means the whole room
is moving slightly? Tilting a little bit to the right or to the
You picked up my sentiments
I could hardly avoid doing that internally--
but notice something
My face hasn't moved
I guesses that
Then it doubled again. That's what I
mean when I say-- impassive. But what does it mean to YOU when
I say impassive
I don't anwer, which I recognize is
my own kind of meaning-- so now I'm in a quandry.
Turn around once and let your eyes catch
me on the fly
(Done, as he turns other enters)
--Did I say? I was dizzy
(Other two back away)
Deal with that on your own. Nobody helps
Well, you did help-- but that's a long
time ago, or rather-- well, right now it can't be axcessed.
I knew you'd see it like that
You turn everything into a work of art
No. Not everything
Well, at least you try
That's not everything
It's a beginning
Yes. It's a beginning.There was the
assumption that truth, once upon a time, might have been in residence
No longer true.
Was it true?
If it's no longer true, I don't think
it was true
A particular friend helped me out of
Doesn't it seem silly-- but what I have
to say in response is that he, or she, blocked all my escape routes
You don't know if it was a he or a she
I can't remember
The truth now--
I really can't remember
Maybe that's what I meant from the beginning.
I can't remember
See? There are no escape routes, which
means, here we are
Here we are
Here we are-- hold onto that
But it's very, very. . .slippery.
(They both fall)In one, single room,
in the hotel radio, I think there's a radio
Is it always in the same room?
I don't follow you
Follow the radio as it moves from room
I have no reason to believe it moves from room to room
Let's put it this way. What is broadcast
goes to a multitude of rooms and other places. The radio itself
is specific in its location
Unless it moves
Is this magic?
Is this divided between part magic and
Is this whole building the Hotel radio?
Another way of looking at it--
--Or is only a part of the building
such a hotel
--Such a radio.
This poses a mental trap
When I'm trapped, I sparkle.
Yes. Those are the vibs I'm getting
Where do you get vibes
(Slowly, holds head)
Here of course. IS THERE A JEWEL IN
I have to suppose so
Check a mirror
I'm not the subject
On and off-- believe me, you're the
I'm just passing through
How appropriate-- this is a hotel. You
see what that means? Since it's appropriate for a hotel, it fits
the definition one hundred per cent that your presence here is
a kind of passing through, and since it's such a very good fit,
there's nothing TRANSIENT about it. It's once and for always
Where's the radio
--In the Hotel radio?
This is a trap
That has certain advantages
In other words, YOU KNOW, as opposed
to a perminent state of being uninformed
I feel uninformed
But that's just a feeling. That's just
the result of being someplace where you don't normally belong,
so take advantage of the slight disoroentation and pick up on
whatever it is that's floating through the air or air-waves and
say 'Here I am in the Hotel radio, TRAPPED-- knock knock knock--
look how I sparkle.
(Knock on the door)
I'm sorry. It's a mistake
Come in anyway
I don't think I'll do that
You see? One thing is proved
You're REALLY TRAPPED. So why don't
we both just hold our heads, and together-- we'll spend alot of
time just doing that thing that heads do better than anything
--I know where
--In the Hotel radio. Hello! Hello!
This is the Hotel radio!The brazillians have taken over Paris.
And the american reports the news back to Nedw York. He is able
to do this because of his private income. If it were not for the
fact of his private income, this fact would never be reported
to Americans who live in New York.
The world would be different!
The world would be different!
The american sits amist small iron statues
of blackest iron which populate his apartment, table top, Avenue
The Brazillians hide faces behind newspapers
from Brazil and Paris both.
The news for americans, to america,
on stations that come from New York.
How often is New York misled-- how often
do arrows of sound say
We come from the small clubs on rue
Vavin, and part of our appeal is the american who, shopping for
chops on the rue General LeClerc remembers-- ah, the time difference
between New York and Paris is close to the time difference between
Paris and Brazil, that part of Brazil that lies on the edge of
the great ocean that separates and joins us all.Hoping to arrive
at the radient city where all things cross; naming that hope,
with a name that cannot be spoken-- He knocks on the preliminary
door, and that door vanishes as his arm thrusts forward and ends
falling through space, rewarded at the end of its trajectory with
a smile called sunlight, bathing the facade of the marble clad
buildings across the wide river.
I knew not that I had come to the edge
of the river
Here's the situation. A bridge exists
approximately one mile down river to your left. And a second bridge
exists approximately one mile down river to your right. So you
find yourself equi-distant from the two possibilities
Must I choose one
If you wish to cross
Must I cross
Of course not
If I wander, back into the town that
proliferates on this side of the river, my being lost will certainly
extend into a trajectory that twisting through its streets, will
bring me closer to one or the other of these two possible bridges--
the choice will be made without my willing it, and I will then
be able to cross, in a logical fashion, that bridge at which I
have arrived, closer
I thought you were considering not crossing
But you reject that?
I reject nothing. I wander, with the
sole knowledge that my wandering will bring me elsewhere than
where I now am
Haven't you disallowed one very real
--That my wandering may simply return
me to my starting point?
Here we are
Yes, here we are
(Close eyes, whirl)
Where am I
Ah, so this is here. Dizziness, placed
Have a seat
There is none
Have a seat
Only one of us is seated
One of us is moving on
What a beautiful view I have of the
far side of the river, facing the facades of buildings, faced
in marble, shining, in the morning sunlightWhat radio noises are
Could it be you slipped
What part of you hears noises
I don't see that happening
I don't see that part of your body either
manufacturing noises-- whereas if I threw you a tidbit--
I'd chew and chew and chew and chew--
Right. Assuming you were hungry
Maybe my ear isn't hungry
Maybe it's another part of the apparatus
that has the hunger for what the radio is capable of producing
Oh? I don't see it
Nobody can see their own ear, unless
they have a mirror available or a friend to testify to its presence
No. I don't see any noises
--Didn't you say something?
That's just me. That doesn't count.
Then don't look
(other covers eyes)
* * * *
Let me show you something, The lines
of my hand are no alphabet
Therefore, a history is a way of avoiding
mistakes in reality
Let me show you something
This was me. Not very long ago
It looks like you
That's what I said. It's me
I have no basis for clarifying the difference
Wait a minute-- you have this photograph
and you have my face
That's just it. The face isn't connected
(Puts photo away, focuses elsewhere)
Look at this
Are you looking at something?
Nothing in particular
What happened to the story
I'm trying to make it disappear into
Do that and I vanish
Let me see your hands
I'm not holding anything readable
(Throws a towel, other wipes)
"Here's what happened. When he cleaned his hands, it was possible to see things in the hand that were less visible when the hands were not so cleansed, and so he concluded, wiping something away-- caused, something else to appear, but what appeared, was to him, still unreadable, though undeniably-- present.
Understanding is harder and harder
Why is that
Because I've reached the end
I don't understand
I don't understand
"Ah, the super-truth, noted in
absentia. What he doesn't understand, he doesn't understand why
he doesn't understand, which is a doubling back on the not understanding
to make it, suitably, radient."
Let me show you something
I don't know, I'm just showing it
But what are you showing?
I don't know
Then how can I have the experience--
Oh, I don't think it can be avoided.
I think it can be talked-not about--
It's being avoided
Let me show you something
You decide.I choose not to see this--
I choose not to see this thing
Let me show you something
(opens for cloth)
What are you showing me
What is this thing
If it vanishes, I can talk about it
Talk about it
It covered your hands effectively
That wasn't a motive
No, but certainly it happened
If it wasn't a motive, I don't think
you should talk about it
If I only talk about motives, I'll end
up at the beginning of time
Wait a minute! --Time has no beginning
How can you say that when you have to
show me things in order to talk about things
You said, talking about it only when
it was put back where it came from
Wait a minute, it didn't come from that
What was it
I didn't say I could say what it WAS, I just said I could TALK about it
(Taken out again)
What is this thing
If I satisfy you by saying its a piece
of fabric, I won't feel good about myself
I don't think that's where I was headed
When I said-- I couldn't talk about
Don't be overly afraid of being self-contradictory
Oh no, but I'm afraid of making it vanish
I can't say
That's not what I'm talking about
What is this thing
What is this thing
You have a funny expression on your
Thiss old thing? This battered and beaten
It's in a cloud of light
I don't see that
I'm the one who sees it
(first, goes and takes cloth, looks,
puts it back)
How am I doing with the cloud of light
my head's in
It's still there from my perspective
What is this thing-- a cloud of light?
I don't know
You claim to see it
Wait a minute-- this 'thing' is something
I can't talk about
Can you touch it? Can you put your hands
(Other opens drawer, takes out coth)
It's covereing your hands
To me, even though I can't see them,
I still have a connection through feeling
Then you can talk about it
This thing. I can't see it, but I'm
talking about it
Your invisible extremities
(raises under cloth)
I can't see them
I can see the fabric
Not if I put it back in the drawer, you can't
Now you can't
Right, I can't
What is this 'thing'
I don't know
You can't see it, and you don't know
what it is.
show you what I'm pointing at
Narrow it down
Now you stopped pointing
Can't you remember?
Listen-- my mind entertains a multitude
I don't believe you. No-- I believe
you, I said I didn't because it was to painful to imagine your
mind whirling about like that at fell speed. But now that I believe
you, stop it.
What am I pointing at
(a brief point)
The wall. The picture
No two people see the same thing in
Let me show you what I'm pointing at
Isn't it self evident?
If you're pointing at it you're pointing
Is that a question?
The minute I say the word it's no longer
Then why did you ask
I pointed to something
Now I realize what was amazing about
that. You turned pointing at something into a question, and heretofore
I didn't know that was possible
I'm still trying to show you something
I'm going to move closer to that picture
It won't help
I didn't say it would help, I said it
was something I was going to do
That doesn't show me anything
I'm not even facing it
Now you are
That's never a question
Show me something
Point at it
Oh, I think you can remember, I don't
think I have to repeat it
"And. . . .amazingly-- he did it without doing it"Let me show you something
(Pause, puts from pocket into drawer)
What did you hide
Did you want to show me how you hid
But it was already hidden from you when
it was in my pocket
That's hardly the point
(Out of pocket)
With a diamond
That verifies my point, it was hidden
Well, in that sense-- isn't everything?
What do you mean by everything
At this moment that ring isn't hidden,
I can see it sparkle
You mean the diamond
So it was hidden after all
--And now it isn't
But if you looked in that drawer to
see what I've hidden--
What do you mean--
Well, look and find out
Ah, but it was hidden
In a sense
In what sense
I don't know why. but it flashed into
my mind that you might as me to try on the ring
That's a good idea
Then you weren't planing on it?
Maybe I was unconsciously
Then why did you start by asking me
to look at something
I don't know
You put something in the drawer, but
as it turns out it was nothing
If you try on this ring-- I wouldn't
call that nothing
What would you call it
I'd call it, making the hand sparkle
The whole hand?
Certainly, as it performs the various
manipulations that in the course of a day bring the hand into
motion, the whole hand would sparkle. If one of the fingers was
wearing this ring.
We'll have to try
Yes we will
How do you like it
I like it fine
Yes, it sparkles-- that's why I like
________________What are you doing
The minute you know what you are doing,
But what are you doing
I have no idea.
This thing kills me-- but it isn't killing
Let's drink to your health
What about your own?
Well. . .I can't put my finger on it
Did you hear something?
I thought I saw something
You mean, after you turned or before
I don't know
I shouldn't have asked
I just shouldn't have asked. I just have that feeling, that I shouldn't have asked
I just have that feeling that I shouldn't have asked
What kind of stories do you like best
I don't understand
I know what a story is
What kind do you like best
I never thought about this
This is a good time to think about it
I like stories, I think, in which there
is a mystery
Notice how you said-- I never think
about this. By using the word 'this'--
--It was as if you were inside one of
The kind you like
With a mystery
Yes. Like hearing or seeing something
behind your back that makes you turn
I didn't see anything
It was outside your field of vision
Either that, or it wasn't there
Oh, it was there or you wouldn't have
I know what kind of stories I like best
A story in which nothing seems meaningful,
and yet in that, there's a mystery
In the fact that nothing seems meaningful.
And yet, there's something outside the range of seeing or hearing.
A mystery. Like life itself
This life you're hypothosizing about
Right. It could end up killing me
But does it
That's a mystery
Let's drink to that
___________________Assume this: through all moments, experience is trying to reach me as the representative of something else.
Not the event as weight, but quite the opposite. Event as local atmosphere:
but why. What secret resides in such
an atmosphere which is only local, the effect of light mixed with
temperature and vista, or archetectural articulation of a space
in which the air is mixed, to varying degree, with particles of
denser matter.A look encountered is lost, no longer look-alike.This
room is named the Rose room. But there are no roses
--Not even absent roses?
--I would have thought that since there
are no roses in the rose room, the fact of their absence would
be especially potent
This is the rose room
There are no roses
--This is important to understand--
what is absent is something else
Other than roses
Hence, still in a sense, roses
--I follow your line of reasoning, but
it is, alas, defective. Your reasoning is that things are defined
by the horison of other things, within which they occur
Or don't occur
--Are we exchanging roles?
This room, where I am-- transient
But that's my role also
Transient in this room
The rose room
The rose room
(enters, with flowers)
The light from a window is something
It's so seductive
What's wrong with that
Look how it articulates this vase
It's a major distraction
That's impossible to deliniate
Then I suggest you give way to distraction,
plus, giving way to beauty, plus, allow the seduction and hope
that inside it, something good happens.
You don't understand
Something good is happening
I'm neutralizing it
Everyuthing good that's happening
If you're neutralizing everything good,
then it's not good
I don't think you understand
I see you want me to go on--
That wasn't what my silence meant to
--All these things, all this beauty and seductiveness, meutralized, means I don't insist on their continuation which is of course impossible since this too shall pass-- and if it's I who do the neutralizing rather than time, that's the one beautiful thing that can continue, or at least be repeated ad infinitum.
Isn't it beautiful
I might as well say yes to my own consideration
Let's neutralize it.
Ah, this is going to happen in secret.
That makes it. . .tremble, like something inside a glass container
that's being agitated
Why are you holding that glass container
up to the light?
It's beautiful. Notice how steady my
Right. Nothing's moving.Here where I
place my feet, on this solid ground. Which I understnd is
only solid provisionally
Could I ask you to except yourself from
I like to come down hard on my own point
of view, whatever I happen to choose for a point of view
Ah, more sunlight
I didn't say that
You didn't have to say that. I could
see it-- or imagine it-- revealing the total contours of your
face, as if I clasped it between my two hands
My appologies. I travelled away from
you at the speed of light
That's because yourendered the brain
powerless-- or am I mistaken?
No, we haven't moved
So what you said about solid ground--
Correct. I lied.